My First And My Last True Love... (My Feelings Over The Death Of My Bf)

You've been gone for so long...
And yet, I still remember these...

i remember when we first met,
u always look at me,
and i always looked away...

i remember our first date,
u just sit there and watch me,
i did the same...

i remember our first kiss,
i start the kiss,
u broke the kiss...

i remember our first time,
i said 'no',
u insisted,
i cried,
u cried too...

i wish i could make that moment stay,
i wish i could turn back time...

now,
i remember our last time,
u never wanna stop,
i'm very mad at you that i leave...

i remember our last kiss,
u smells like cigarette, with that sweet scent of ur perfume,
i'm flying high and i tell you that that was the best kiss ever...

i remember our last date,
u went shopping with me even though u hated to do that before
u are so different that day
but i feel happy
i should've known better...

i remember the last time we met,
u just lie there on the bed, u're not moving, u're eyes closed,
i held ur hands, u held mine back.
it was warm and assuring, i remember how it felt until now...

u've been coma for three weeks...
and that was all...
u left me here alone...
u left me here wishing that i could turn back time
and make all of our last as our first again...

do u know that every night i'll sing songs for you?
and drop tears for you?
and laugh for you?
every night, i wish you were there...
i even cry when i wrote this...
coz u're never coming back to me...

do u know that even when i was with someone else,
i wish he was u?
do u know that i'll do anything to ever swicth place with u?
so that u're the one who will write this while crying remembering me...?
do u know how much i missed u? and loved u?

i will meet u again...
untill that day, i never had my heart open for anyone...
u're my first and my last true love...
i will wait until the day that i die,
so that i can see u again, my love...
i love you... ...

In Loving Memory of

Wan Mohd Hasraf b. Wan Ibrahim

(1985-2006)

God, Help Me!! (My Feelings Over The Death Of My Bf)

i can't let go...
i still can't let him go...
y do God took him away from me?
i miss him so bad...
i can't seem to find someone else...
it's like a curse,
i can't love somone else...
whenever i try to fall in love again,
it won't work out...
and when those relationship fails,
i remember him more...
i feel sad more than ever...
if only he's still around,
God, help me,
i'll do anything to go back to those time...
i miss him!!!
i want him!!!
life's lonely without him...
sometime before i sleep,
i think i can hear his voice...
his sweet simple voice....
i want to hear it all again...
i don't want to forget it...
it's fading away from my mind...
i don't want to forget...
the way he call my name,
the way he touch me,
the way he kiss me,
i miss him...

he said he would never leave me...
but y did he go?
y did God took him away from me?
bring him back to me...
he's the only one who can love me...
i don't remember what's it like to love anymore...
i know love makes you happy...
but when i go out with someone else,
i can only pretend to be happy...
i'm not happy!!!
bring him back to me...
i don't know what happiness is like anymore...
i only know how to cry at night...
i only know how to pretend...

i miss him...
God, help me...
if You can't bring him to me,
bring me to him...
i wanna die too...
i want him...
help me...

In Loving Memory of

Wan Mohd Hasraf b. Wan Ibrahim

(1985-2006)